Every Goddess Inch.

I have a fish tank in my office with five fish and an algae eater inside it. I’ll bet you didn’t know that about me, did you?

I also know what you’re going to ask next. What kind of fish are they, J? Heh. Actually, you’re probably wondering where this story is going and how in the heck it relates to the title. To which I reply, “All in good time, all in good time.”

So, anyway, I have these fish in my office at work. The type of fish is Inherited Fish. I know that’s not a type but bear with me, please. My former boss’ former boss had a huge fish tank in his office and apparently they were very happy fish because they pro-created and had baby fish. Five of them. They were the ugliest baby fish anyone had ever seen before. My former boss’ former boss gave those five baby fish to my former boss. Then, my former boss (who at the time was my boss) departed the company and gave them to me. Thus, they are Inherited Fish from my former boss.

I have been neglecting the Inherited Fish lately. They have an automatic feeder which feeds them twice per day. Plus, they don’t need a lot of attention, they are FISH after all. They have grown and one of them has become quite pretty. Although, one of these days I think it might be fun to put on my snorkel gear and pop my head into their line of vision, just so they remember from whence they came.

So, since I’ve been neglecting them lately, their water level has diminished to about a half a tank. Which means they’ve had to spend a lot of quality time with each other in close quarters. I went to WALMART (yes, I said WALMART) at lunch today to buy them a few gallons of water, which are presently sitting over there next to their tank to adjust to the room’s temperature before I drown them with fresh, clean water and expand their swimming area by six gallons.

As I was walking through WALMART, I heard a commercial playing over their loud system that made me stop in my tracks and rip a piece of cardboard box from a transporter of macaroni & cheese (or cheese & macaroni, you choose) to write the words down. The commercial went like this …

Blah blah blah “… and remember, every INCH of a goddess is nothing LESS than divine.”

After I carried six gallons of water up two flights of stairs and returned to my office, I told my Inherited Fish, “Inherited Fish? You must appreciate your Divine Goddess who provides you with food and water, because I just carried SIX GALLONS OF WATER more than ONE THOUSAND INCHES.”

I don’t think they cared.