Crazy Male Fish.

Yesterday seemed to be the day for diarrhea in the butt for me (stress/hormone related, not turkey related, thank you very much), so I figured I should just make it an all around diarrhea week and write about something that I just can’t stand to not write about anymore. It’s making me crazy, I tell you. Loopy crazy. I must write about it, I just can’t not write about it.

INHERITED FISH!

There. I said it. They are making me crazy. They have taken over my living room. They are noisy and troublesome and they bother me. I never knew they were so LOUD! Did you hear me? LOUD, I said, LOUD! They hypnotize me, I can’t stop watching them. Then, if I’m able to concentrate on something else, they make noises, *tink clink tink* on the glass, calling me to come stare at them.

The male fish is being overly aggressive. I’m not kidding. He is chasing all the other fish and nipping them. So much so, that they’ve crammed themselves up against the side of the tank, between the coral inside of the tank and the glass that keeps them off my couch. These are fish that normally don’t like each other, but apparently they’ve looked at the situation in the rest of the tank (i.e., if they’re caught in no-man’s land they’re dead) and decided they’ll put up with close quarters as long as they don’t get nipped in the tail fin. The thing is, I can clear the room with my gas but male fish is clearing the tank with his attitude. I am impressed.

Four fish are visible. Baby #3 is inside the coral, but I can’t see her.

My husband has gently reprimanded me on a number of occasions that I need to “let go” of the fish. That I’m too concerned with them. He’s right. I freely admit that. Then, last night, I was on the computer and I heard, “Stop being such a buttnugget!” I turned around and said, “Did you just talk to my fish?” He tried to look all innocent and made the false claim of, “No. No. It wasn’t me.” I grunted, thereby letting him know that I knew he was faking. He continued to proclaim his innocence. I grunted again.

The thing is, Male Fish was dumping and bulldozing loads of rocks right near Tony’s head, then turning around and swishing more rocks with his tail. That’s what makes the *tink clink tink* noises that call to me. When he got bored with that, he chased the other fish while doing acrobatical performances, flipping and nipping, that’s his routine. He is a Buttnugget.

Link to Video of Rock Pushing.

The reason for all this madness on the part of Male Fish? He wants to mate. What is with this “mating” thing that’s going on?

**Update, 4:55PM** During the time I stepped out for a meeting, one of my female fish started holding. Oh boy!